Well, I must admit I never gave online matchmaking much — if any — thought until a longtime friend of mine bubbled over with delight in telling me of her new love last week. Shortly after becoming a widow in her early 80s she said “I put myself out there” and, after a four-month search, I have been seeing him exclusively for three months (showing me his photo on her phone) and I’m absolutely in love!”
“It’s electrifying! I mean there’s real chemistry,” she swooned over lunch at a favorite downtown restaurant on Main Street in downtown Sarasota. “You must give it a try.”
In her case it took just a season and just two other dates with guys she never even considered seeing again after a first encounter.
So I listened attentively in disbelief interjecting a few questions here and there. It was obvious she has been and still is a very smart cookie. Has all her marbles and then some. Professional/leadership positions her entire career as well as a community leader in active retirement.
“She encouraged me to set up a profile and get in the mix. After a good deal of hesitation on my part, she offered to help me set up a profile on what she considered the best site out there.
“But I’m not looking for anyone to fill a gaping hole in my life,” I countered.
Still, I was curious… as I am about so much I encounter.
Questions I asked myself:
Q. What do I want to get out of this (if anything) other than another blog post?
A. Probably nothing but I’m curious, as always.
Q. Is is safe?
A. Well, I do have to post pictures but I can use a couple with my sunglasses on and throw in a baby picture.
Q. Can I be anonymous?
A. I must register with real information purportedly confidential and make up a profile name for some or all to see.
Q. Do I have to pay to play?
A. After an abridged free version , which is essentially worthless, I found out on this “premier” platform I do have to whip out my credit card and pay a few buck for a limited amount of time at my discretion. I chose the shortest period: three months.
Q. What would happen if I got any “likes” and conversation started?
A. I really don’t know, I answered myself. Would I freeze up? Answer? Block? Follow through with a phone call (also able to block my number)? Actually arrange to meet in person?
Q. Do I really need to stir things up? Don’t I have enough going on in my life?
A. I’m busy enough…but the curiosity about the process is fascinating an an unexpected number of women in my circle have tried this. Some many years ago and some even now.
Not one to be a shy violet and always curious about everything, I decided to give it a try just to appease my inner drive to be an explorer.
If you, too, are curious, I’ll post an update with my observations about this platform that a surprising number of people in their mature years are using to find their matches.
And, please, if you have any insights or experiences, please share!
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Of course I want to know how this goes! Lots of luck!!
Hope you and your loved ones stay well!!
Wishing you the VERY best experience.
I had been on and off for many years since moving to Florida in 2004. I learned a lot about myself, what I didn’t want and eventually what I did want. I tried to have an open mind, and connected with a significant number of men on an intellectual basis, but no chemistry. I did have some fun on a few dates, and fun corresponding via the site and chatting on the phone, after a few messages.
As you may remember, I started a singles group and we did activities, dance lessons, happy hours etc. This was before Meet Up existed. I eventually blended the group with a Meet Up site I purchased. Eight years in the running, 4 marriages, many successful (don’t know for how long) relationships, and lots of fun. Many of us still dance, since we all learned together from a professional instructor.
I never found a compatible “date” but lots and lots of great friends!
Last year I went to a Meet Up, and in walked a guy, we immediately connected, and are presently in a relationship. We are having so much fun, not concerned about where this will go, still getting to know each other, doing some traveling together, and acting like teenagers! We laugh all the time about this!
I’ve always believed in face-to-face first impressions, and seven seconds will do it. REALLY!
Have fun with all the experiences. Big Hugs!